Am I feminist ? 1.0

Am I feminist ? 1.0

 

Am I feminist ? Is it hard being a women in a male dominant industry ? 

I get asked these questions A lot. My answer has always been NO, but I recently hesitated for a sec.. I almost changed my mind. I have never put energy towards female / men equality or in any feminist movements what so ever.. I just always fought for what I believed in, no matter what that was and I’ve always tried to empower poeple no matter who they were. I don’t think as myself has a women when I’m standing in front of man and when I'm surrounded with guys, I simply see us has humans. Aren’t we all tho? I have to say that I usually stay blind in moments of injustice so that I can focus on what needs to be done.  I rather chanel my energy torwards what's good instead of accentuating the difference ... But lately… I've been forced to feel the difference.

Don’t get me wrong, I love men.. romantically, profesionally and I cherish my friendships. I am surrounded by amazing guys and woudn’t see myself without them. I have to say though that the last couple years, I have realised that there are some people still mentally ‘old fashion’. Apparently some can get intimitaded by us … you’d think power to us but trust me it’s tainted. The more powerful you are, the more intimitading you become and it makes it harder. Well, apparently... cause those guys will find ways to make you feel inferior no matter how hard you try to show your worth and the more you get pushed a side. Obviously, it’s not everyone. Some are smart and will team up with us ‘ intimitating women lol’ and be allies.

I met a powerful girl last night, she is a movie & commercial producer, another male dominant industry. I opened up to her about my life and she said ‘ Maude, I am feminist cause the world is how it actually looks like. Stop fooling youself. You will never win over man, espacially not men but luckily you don’t need anyone’

I stopped for a second, heavy heart, water in my eyes because I could unfortunitely relate to those words and I thought to my myself that afterall, maybe I should be feminist … but I’m not and I dont think i’ll ever be. I will tell you one thing though, I have been and will be fcked over being a women but I dont want to draw attention to that to increase the gap and the difference between us. On another hand, I will keep pushing no matter what gender I am and will support, ally & push women & men equaly. Women, let’s just be aware of this reality & work together. Guys, who had my back, treated me with no differences, who helped me & pushed me to be a better person, thank you. I couldn’t be the women that I am today without you, I appreciate you more then I ever did. You know who you are. 

Let’s be one. In my mind I always thought that we were.

Maude.

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